People keep asking about our manifesto, because that’s the standard we’re expected to comply to.

Let me tell you about manifestos: they’re not worth the paper they’re written on.

Every mainstream party has at least two manifestos, the first being the published one. The one they sweat over: the one that pollsters and PR’s are commissioned to draft because a manifesto’s nothing more than an advertising campaign full of false promises and far horizons, designed to get you to vote for an illusion. A manifesto is a document approved by people who know it isn’t a contract, because if it was, governments would routinely find themselves in court on the grounds of bad faith.

The second manifesto remains secret unless the party wins. They don’t announce it, of course. They’re not that silly. But it’s drip-fed to us over the course of their premiership through broken promises and the introduction of unpopular policies no one ever heard of before. 

It’s quite simple, really.

That said, Hoi Polloi isn’t duplicitous. We call it like it is:



Immigration is top of the list as far as voters go. But here’s the thing: whenever people talk about immigration, they’re talking about Eastern Europe. So to be honest, the immigration issue is in actual fact: the EU issue.

Membership of the European Union guarantees the free movement of labour throughout EU member states. This made perfect sense when it was only western and southern Europe, but once eastern Europe was admitted into the Union, it created problems. Eastern Europe had for decades been a part of the Soviet bloc, and remains relatively impoverished. It doesn’t take an economist to work out that unemployed people in hopelessly poor countries will naturally migrate from one side of Europe to the other.

But let’s be clear: this isn’t about race. It’s about jobs.

This issue highlights what a disaster the European experiment has become. Broadly speaking, Hoi Polloi think EC Good; EU bad. The idea of Europe as a trading bloc made perfect sense, but a European Parliament?

When I first arrived in the UK in 1990, talk of the EU was in full swing and I failed to comprehend why a continent that had been at war with itself for thousands of years could somehow come under one roof and agree on anything. For starters (before eastern Europe got a look in) there were two Europes: West and South. West was hard-working and thrifty; South politically corrupt and “lazy”. How could this possibly work out?

Simply put: it hasn’t. In the last European elections, the UK turnout was just over a third: 34.19%. One third! That means two thirds of the voters in this country know bugger all about the most powerful legislative body in the world. Hoi Polloi believe the European Parliament is nothing more than an extra layer of government we neither need nor want. It’s so powerful, yet so inconsequential, that fringe parties like the BNP and UKIP get elected. On the upside, so do the Greens.

We don’t think pulling out of Europe is a sensible idea, but we do think the EU needs to be rethought: back to the drawing board, so to speak. If more than half the population couldn’t be bothered to vote for it, it is clearly illegitimate, the bastard child of the European political elite.

But Hoi Polloi have a unique solution: a three day week. Since the issue is about jobs, let’s spread them around. Instead of many working and some not, we could all work a lot less.

We should stop working for the economy, and start making it work for us. We’ve got to snap out of this mentality that we have to work ourselves to death in order to maintain a comfortable position in society. Work obviously needs to be done, but in the current paradigm there are many people who don’t work at all. This places undue pressure on those with jobs to work longer and harder than they should, all the while facing the constant threat of unemployment which leads inevitably to poverty and destitution.

This is an unacceptable waste of human skill, talent and horsepower.

Over the past century, industrial and computer technology has had a major impact on society which is getting out of hand. We have to start making those machines work for all of us, not just the people who own them. I propose a 3 day week of 6 hours a day, which will at the very least double the workforce at all of Murdoch’s outfits. The fact billionaires even exist is proof they’re making too much money out of the rest of us. It’s time we had a government willing to stand up to big business and demand they accept they have a social responsibility to provide jobs for all, not just the few they can work to death.

The bottom line is: don’t blame the immigrants for immigration.


The Environmet

This should be top policy.

But mainstream parties keep banging on about immigration and the economy because they’d prefer to distract us from what really matters: Mother Earth.

All they’re interested in is securing funds from corporate donors, and hippy-shit “caring for the environment” doesn’t matter to these short-sighted, ego-driven fools who can’t see beyond their own, soulless deaths. Leave it to them and we’re doomed. The planet will survive, but we won’t. Nor will many others.



This is tricky because anyone who’s bought a house or flat in the last 20 years – especially in hotspots like London – has paid an awful lot of money for it.

Too much money.

We’re of the opinion the land under your home shouldn’t be worth more than the building on it.

Why is land so expensive? More to the point, why do we have to pay for it?

The elephant in the room in this country is that it’s been under foreign occupation by the French aristocracy for the best part of a thousand years. William the Conqueror – a French duke – destroyed King Harold and the Anglo-Saxon nobility in 1066, then divvied up the country among his French supporters, imposing a continental feudal system upon the people. William commissioned the Domesday Book, which was an audit of the kingdom for the specific purpose of taxing the English.

1235 saw the first of the Enclosure Acts: the Statute of Merton. This permitted – by an Act of Parliament – the enclosure of common land to be privately farmed. Five thousand of these Acts over five hundred years transferred 7 million acres of farmland from public to private hands, in the same way the railways and utilities were privatised in the 80’s and 90’s, just like the taxpayers bailed out the banks. In each case we see the Parliament-sanctioned transfer of an enormous amount of wealth from the public into private hands.

So what to do?

First, rid the country of rentiers, people who prosper by renting the planet to people. They didn’t create the earth, so what makes you think they should own it?

Secondly, we have to stop thinking of our homes as an “investment”. That works for the banks, but it doesn’t work for us. Why? Because money tied up in property isn’t money flowing through the economy. All expensive property does is make bankers richer than they already are.

And no, we don’t think governments should sell off council houses to bribe the recipients into voting for them. That’s what caused the housing crisis in the first place. Thanks for that, Madge.


Monetary Policy 

97% of money is created by privately owned banks, with interest. This must stop. Rather than listen to me, listen to Positive Money. 



It’s quite simple to run a country: you work out what it costs, and then you raise the taxes to do it. The Tories seem to think our taxes don’t cover the cost of services, so they’re cutting them. Which begs the question: what are we paying our taxes for? Again, the answer is simple: we’re servicing the debt incurred by the banks.

Of course, we could carry on with this nonsense or we could get sensible about it. For a start we could stop paying £84 Billion in subsidies to privatised corporations. Then we could collect the £120 Billion in taxes avoided by the corporatocracy. Then we could get the banks to service the debts we incurred to keep them afloat, and after that we can dismantle those banks and sell their assets. They think we can’t manage without them. We know we can.



Free as it was always intended to be. Hoi Polloi despises the privatisation of public assets. Simples.


The Law

Free as it should be, just like the NHS. The Law is one of the original foundations of civilization, and should be clearly understood and available to all.